I took a bit of a break at the end of last year, to refresh and get over a terrible illness! But now I’m back and ready for 2018!
This post is the beginning of a new experiment!
I’m going to try a few new things this year, a few new types of posts. I’m still a very new blogger, trying to find my style and voice. A lot of the posts I have written so far have been project or goal-based. But I’m also looking to explore and write some more prosaic and theory-based posts. I’d love to share some of the amazing parenting lessons I’ve learned from the ECFE classes I’ve been taking with my boys. I’m also really interested in exploring some of the philosophies behind some of the anxieties and sadness that I feel- in a way that could help all of us moms out there relate to each other better.
Right now, though, I have a question for you.
Are you sick of New Year’s Resolutions? I have been grappling with this question all week, actually. I was trying to figure out what the best kind of post would be for this blog for the new year. My goals of mindfulness, minimalism and living life at a slower pace are somewhat out of sync with the New Year’s Resolution. I don’t want to adopt any new behaviors or radical changes. I definitely don’t need to add any new stress into my life! And I’m working so hard to appreciate a simpler, more modest approach to a day, to a to-do list, etc. I want a daily routine that has more peace, less panic.
How do you feel about New Year’s Resolutions?
It can feel like you’re not doing your “homework” if you don’t have a New Year’s Resolution. It’s such a standard small-talk question at this time of year. “Do you have any resolutions?” And don’t get me wrong- I’m not saying they are a bad thing. The optimistic approach of starting with a clean slate, making positive change or sticking to a behavior can be really refreshing.
For me, personally, I just don’t think it works. I’m the type of person who views life through a pretty hard-and-fast filter. If I start a new habit, and miss even one day, I feel the entire experiment is a failure and I give up. So a resolution, at the outset, is an opportunity for me to challenge myself to do something at which I know I’ll fail. And then I do, and I prove something silly and untrue TO myself ABOUT myself.
If this is true of you as well…
I still think you could make a New Year’s Resolution if you want to. It would require a daily chat with yourself. An affirmation that you’re on the right track, that you can make slow change, and even if you miss a day or two, it’s OK! And you would probably have to set yourself smaller, “trial run”, time frames. I talk about that idea in this post (look for the part about time).
However, I’m trying something different this year
And you’re welcome to try it with me. It’s very, very simple. We’re a few days into the New Year and we have more than three hundred days of opportunity ahead. What if our “New Year’s Resolution” doesn’t involve making a big transformation? What if we already have all the tools in front of us to be our best selves? I realized the other day that, five years ago, if I’d told myself what I was doing with my life today, I would have thought I made it. I am living the life I dreamed I would be living.
But in actuality? This doesn’t feel anything like the dream! There’s stress, bills, boredom, messes… Most days, it feels like hell, not heaven. And certainly not the stuff of dreams.
I’m looking at my life through the filter of “what’s missing?”
My New Year’s Resolution doesn’t have anything to do with making change. I have everything I need already- just ask Five-Years-Ago-Me!
So what is missing? Anything?
What if the answer is NO?
My goal for this year isn’t a goal at all. I mean- I do have things I want to accomplish. But I don’t have a New Year’s Resolution. I have a deep desire to feel differently about my life. A need to see the best in everything. I want to greet each day with joy, cherish these precious moments with my children. I do want to grow as a person… through very simple actions- reading some of the many books I have on my shelves! Enjoying the possessions I already have instead of shopping for more STUFF. Journaling. Blogging. Regular date nights with my husband!
Life is just waiting to be lived.
I realize I’m not saying anything groundbreaking. I’m not intending to make waves. The fact that these ideas are so obvious is exactly my point! We have all the tools we need at our disposal to live our best lives, be our best selves. We are already here, in this moment, bursting with promise!
Don’t make a New Year’s Resolution. Just start the New Year.
I can’t wait to share it with you. Let’s go!